I’ve had so many struggles with how all this works. How can we lose all motivation to go, to do? How can there be no ability to even be pragmatic, to Do things just because they need doing? I still don’t completely grasp this idea, probably because I haven’t experienced it in my life. But I know that monster exists, the evil Gave-up Monster that takes away desire and motivation. The monster that encourages its own existence by stifling and seeking out all possible help to maintain its position. I see it attacking all the time.
I know there are tactics to fight. Unfortunately, one of those isn’t a good one, though it has good intentions. Throwing Scripture around as a mantra, repeating and repeating, has been advertised to us as a means to battle this sickness. Romans 8:28 is a classic, repeated as if a spell to be cast that will resolve all trials.
“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”
Yep, the verse is sound truth. It has been proven over and over that God has lived up to this statement. But it isn’t a cure-all. It doesn’t work, just repeating it.
The answer is not simple repetition, in my experience. I would rather live by the rules in Romans 12, which lead me to Philippians 2.
Romans 12:1-2 (ESV)
“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
Philippians 2:12-18 (ESV)
“Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.
Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain. Even if I am to be poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all. Likewise you also should be glad and rejoice with me.”
Thanks to a really good conversation with my brother today, I got this sort of solidified in my mind. I’ve thought about it all and tried to practice it, but sometimes putting it to the test of discussion, putting it in my own words really makes it tangible.
So today is application for me, not just in pursuit of the cure. I must take my steps in the Word, and when I can’t grasp a concept or give up a sin or commit to a Godly quality, I must take God’s word, wrangle over it, daily if necessary, to break through the barrier that prevents me from approaching Him.
Baby steps, as the pastor told my beloved last week, are what it takes. Same for me. Maybe I don’t suffer from the DeMotivation Give-Up Monster’s presence, but my faults demand the same therapy. I have to work moment-by-moment to resolve my salvation. Progressive sanctification isn’t anything more than a walk. It’s not just any walk, though, but consists of a crippled, broken man who is self-centered, miserable and lacking in faith, who stumbles and gets lost along the way.
An aside, but still pertinent: So many people live in fear. I think it’s horrible. This is the fear I’d like to live with, and ideally the only one that is valid. If I don’t get something the Bible has said, if I don’t understand my own position before the Lord on a given issue, that is when I should have fear. Working out my salvation with fear and trembling means just this: When I’m in a position to be wrong, I should be afraid, afraid enough to want to chase that resolution to ground. If I’m set up to do wrong, I need to remember that I am at risk of being opposed to my God. That alone should be cause for fear and trembling. Nothing the world has to offer should be able to cause fear that comes close to this.
Just as with my driving, as I have to constantly check the map in order to keep my car going in the right direction (I could use a GPS), I need to check, persistently, the directions from the Bible, for nothing else will get me to the next hill or mountain top. Nothing else can get me through these valleys and ravines.
Jars of Clay
The Valley Song (Sing of Your Mercy)
You have led me to the sadness
I have carried this pain
on a back bruised, nearly broken
I’m crying out to You
I will sing of Your mercy
that leads me through valleys of sorrow
to rivers of joy
when death, like a gypsy
comes to steal what I love
I will still look to the heavens
I will still seek your face
but I fear You aren’t listening
because there are no words
just the stillness
and the hunger
for a faith that assures
I will sing of Your mercy
that leads me through valleys of sorrow
to rivers of joy
alleluia, alleluia
alleluia, alleluia
while we wait for rescue
with our eyes tightly shut
face to the ground using our hands
to cover the fatal cut
though the pain is an ocean
tossing us around, around, around
You have calmed greater waters
higher mountains have come down
I will sing of Your mercy
that leads me through valleys of sorrow
to rivers of joy
I will sing of Your mercy
that leads me through valleys of sorrow
to rivers of joy
alleluia, alleluia
alleluia, alleluia
